How Do I Find a Credible Family Law Attorney in the Hectic Time of Divorce?

How Do I Find a Credible Family Law Attorney in the Hectic Time of Divorce?Family Law Attorney

Chances are that if you are asking this question in the ‘hectic time of divorce” you are already significantly behind in the process. That does not mean that you will not be able to find the right attorney and bring yourself up to speed but only that you need to begin to select a attorney soon. Importantly, thought, you should do so with a purpose keeping in mind what your intended goals are in the divorce process.

Certainly the process can feel overwhelming. After all, your entire life is about to change forever. You will be tasked with making decisions in a relatively short period of time that have the potential to profoundly affect your life and the lives of those that you love.  With the weight of such heavy decisions looming the process of divorce can seem overwhelming, certainly hectic and, at times, leave you feeling helpless. The cure, for lack of a better word, for those feelings is knowledge. Once you have had the entire process explained to you by a competent and credible family law attorney who can tell you what the law is, what your rights are, and what to expect through the journey, the feeling of helplessness will slowly but surely change and you can begin to confidently move forward to the next phase of your life. This article is designed to help you find the right attorney to help you to that next step

The Three Legged Race

Most people, whether in school or the family picnic, have participated or laughed hysterically while watching the three legged race. Invariably the winners were the contestants who were best matched in size and in purpose and moved seamlessly together.  Those teams that were completely mismatched failed miserably but provided the best laughs.  Choosing a attorney to help you through the divorce process is much like trying to pair a team to succeed in the three legged race.

Perhaps the most overlooked aspect of this process is realizing that you are choosing a partner in this process and that the two of you are a team.  You need your attorney and your attorney needs you. The process is hardly ever successfully accomplished if one or the other simply hands off responsibility for the divorce process to the other.  As such, it is absolutely critical that you be comfortable with your attorney as your partner in the process and that you are both moving in the same direction at all times. A good family law attorney understands this and will, from your first meeting to your final judgment of divorce, explain this very concept and strive to educate you and to fully understand your concerns and your desired goals.

The first step begins with an initial consult where you will meet with the attorney and their team (should they have one). This is your chance to explain what is going on in your life and begin the education process. There is no doubt that from the minute you first contemplated a divorce that you have literally thought of a hundred different questions. Take some time before the initial consult to write those questions down so as not to forget them while you are there. Be sure to also take notes or draft a narrative of everything that has happened in your marriage whether it be financial issues, infidelity, children issues, etc. that you feel is important for your attorney to know.  Chances are not all of those facts will be legally relevant but at least you will know one way or the other before leaving the attorney’s office.

What should you expect from the attorney? A good attorney will take the time to listen your story before diving into the law. After all, the law does not operate in a vacuum.  The attorney must have the facts in order to tell you how the law applies to your particular case.  If they are not willing to take the time to listen to your case this should be your first red flag.  Also, important in some respects is whether your attorney inquired about your emotional or mental wellness. The divorce process can be traumatic and a good attorney knows that your mental and emotional wellness is critical to surviving and succeeding (yes succeeding) in the process.  If there are any issues there, a good attorney will be able to provide you with a referral to a therapist to help.

After hearing your story a good attorney will tell you the law and how it applies to your facts.  As a general rule, you should receive specific advice on equitable distribution (how the assets and debts are divided), alimony, custody/visitation, and child support.  Those are just some general areas that must be covered.  Depending on your particular circumstances there may be other legal issues that arise but at a minimum you should expect to receive a complete understanding of those issues.

Finally, at the conclusion of the initial consult you and your attorney should have a “game plan” in place.  This is a loosely crafted approach as to how and when you and your attorney get to your stated objectives.   You may or may not have had an idea of what you “wanted” in the divorce before you met with the attorney but chances are that after you got your crash course in the law that your goals have changed.  Putting together a plan to get there is important for you as it gives you piece of mind that you are no longer aimlessly afloat in the process.  It is also important for you AND your attorney so that there is no confusion as to what is trying to be accomplished.

A seasoned attorney will no doubt have their initial consults down to an hour give or take a few minutes but should you not feel satisfied that you have all your questions answered a credible family attorney should have no problem spending additional time to answer those questions.  Again, establishing a good repor and with your attorney and defining a game plan going forward are the most important things that happen in this initial consult.  If at the conclusion of the meeting you do not feel as though you have established both of these components DO NOT feel compelled to move forward with that attorney. Thank them for their time, pay their initial consult fee, kindly tell them that you will review their retainer agreements, and feel free to call another attorney. A good attorney will completely understand and simply wait to hear back from you.  Not every attorney is the right fit.

Friends and Family

With divorce rates as they are – approximately 50% of all marriages end in divorce – chances are that you have friends or family members who have gone through the divorce process. You should not hesitate to contact that person and ask them about their attorney.  Aside from finding someone that can relate to what you are going through, you are going to get an unbiased and honest opinion on their attorney’s performance.

When deciding who to ask you should take a moment to be a little critical and determine which one of my friends or family members who went through this process is most like me in terms of personality. Again, what you are looking for in your attorney is a partner in the process and if there is a like-minded individual out there that successfully partnered with a family attorney to get through the process then chance are they can do the same for you.  Keeping in mind much of what was discussed above, you should be sure to ask your friend or family member if their attorney educated them, guided them throughout the process, and accomplished their desired goals.

Here you should be careful not to rely too much on novice legal advice.  Anyone that has gone through the process will have more “legal” knowledge than you but, in most instance, you will come away more confused than when you started.  Gather as much information as you can about the attorney, not the law, and decide if the attorney sounds like a good fit and proceed from there.

Jack of All Trades and Master of None

Florida restricts attorneys from claiming to “specialize” in any particular practice area.  That said, you should be looking for a attorney whose practice is primarily, if not exclusively, focused on family law. What you will find when you begin your search for a credible family law attorney is that almost every attorney claims to be able to get you divorced. You should explore that attorney’s website and see how many other areas of law that attorney claims to practice.  The more areas of practice listed, the less likely that they are particularly competent in any of those areas. If they do not have a website, move on.  This point cannot be emphasized enough.  In Florida, family law has its own set of statues that govern divorce.  Florida also has its own set of rules of civil procedure and forms that dwarf those rules that apply to other civil cases. In addition, new law is made weekly through the decisions of appellate courts throughout the State. If you are not teaming with an attorney familiar with all of these areas you are not teaming with a credible family law attorney.

You Get What You Pay For

An important, sometimes the most important, consideration in choosing an attorney is cost.  Here you should keep in mind the old saying “you get what you pay for.”  Some attorney’s hourly rates will be higher than others. Keep in mind that those rates are (or should be) commensurate with the number of years that the attorney has been practicing. Some attorneys require a large retainer up front before they start. Others will begin with a smaller retainer and bill you down the road after the retainer is used up. There is no right or wrong approach here.

What you should keep in mind is that a seasoned and credible family law attorney will cost more per hour. That said, their experience should translate in to more efficient work and less hours so in the end you will save money with a seasoned attorney. Another important consideration is whether you are hiring a solo practitioner or someone who has associate attorneys working with them whose hourly rates are less and can take on some of the ministerial tasks of your case to save you money.

In the end what you should look for is an honest assessment by the attorney of the projected cost of your case AFTER you have developed a game plan in your initial consult. A credible family law attorney will tell you what you need to hear (the true potential costs) as opposed to what you want to hear (a sales pitch to get you to sign the retainer).

Counselor, Litigator, or Both

The divorce process can seem overwhelming.  Remember, the right knowledge is the key to overcoming those feeling of helplessness and being overwhelmed.  The key to getting the right knowledge is to find the right family law attorney.  Keeping in mind much of what was just discussed, hopefully you will find the right fit for you and your needs.

Would you like to gain more information on this topic.


Karen Lungarelli, Esq.

(305) 998-3828

1001 Brickell Bay Drive, Suite 1200

Miami, FL 33131


From a Freshman, with Love

Going into my junior year now, I wish I could have expressed what I was going through at that time to my parents. This is a letter I believe many freshmen can relate to.

FromFrom a Freshman, With Love a Freshman, With Love

Dear Mom and Dad,

I’m sorry I don’t call as often as I should. See, it’s not all fun and games over here. I am still trying to find my place; as you know, I only knew one person from high school. I’m also very stressed, as I still have no idea what to declare as my major. It’s funny, you know, how people say it does not matter what you major in undergraduate. Of course it does. At this moment, it feels as if the rest of my life will be determined based off of what that paper says I’m capable of doing. I know it’s not what the degree says but what you do with it that matters. Yet, there is so much pressure. There is so much I want to do. I just don’t know how to choose just one thing. How will I know if it’s the right decision? What if I want to change my mind again? What if they don’t let me?

If you’re out of breath just reading that, imagine how claustrophobic I’m feeling right now. I’m overwhelmed, lost, confused, and lonely. My entire world changed drastically in a matter of a year. I am in a complete new environment; I miss the beach. My best friend since 5th grade is no longer down the street, I had to start all over. I don’t know who to trust. I don’t have my car up here, so I automatically feel dependent and you know I dislike relying on others. That being said, I am also sorry I am not working right now. I know paying for school and housing is already a lot to ask for. I just don’t know how I could balance all of that right now.

I also know that if I call and ask for money, you will get upset and say that is all I call for. So I rather just not call, you know, to avoid problems. I want to hear how your day is going and I mean to call more often but I don’t know what to say on the phone. I don’t want to ruin your day because I’m upset. I know you see photographs of me on social media out with friends and having a good time. That’s only sometimes, because let’s be honest, no one is taking pictures at the library.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I don’t want you to take my absence personally. I am at a very difficult stage in my life. I am trying to figure everything out. Hopefully, I figure it out soon. I love you both and I am so grateful for this opportunity you have given me. I will work on calling more often. I will work on creating a balanced lifestyle up here with time for studying, exercise, friends, phone calls, and possibly a job. I will work and I won’t give up. Time to make you proud.


Your freshman in college


MGS Counseling & Therapy Services, LLC is a South Florida private practice. Mrs. Wilson works with mothers dealing with postpartum and fathers who have difficulty with transitional changes after a new child. In addition Mrs. Wilson works with individuals, couples and families to find their inner strength and resolve interpersonal and relational conflicts. To schedule an appointment with Mrs. Wilson call (754) 999-0410 or contact by email at

Forgotten Beauty

Forgotten Beauty

Forgotten Beauty, Couch, MGS Counseling

The topic of discussion at my house for the past few weeks has been our living room. “It’s ugly and outdated. We need to fix it”, I would tell my father. It wasn’t until a friend of mine came over and made me realize something. The moment she stepped her foot inside my apartment, she complimented our living room; “Wow. I love your living room. It’s beautiful”. Shocked and confused, I let out a chuckle and replied: “You’re joking, right? I haven’t stopped annoying my dad to change it up. I think it’s hideous”. “Val, what are you talking about? The blue curtains match the blue couch, the painting behind the couch pops because of the color contrast, and the coffee table is unreal- I’ve never seen anything like it”, she answered.

I stepped back, looked around, and analyzed everything she previously mentioned. She was right. From the medium sized palm tree in the corner, to the coffee table my father designed, and even the collection of antique pictures taken of my dad’s grandmother when she was 16. The room was truly a work of art. It was beautiful! I immediately felt bad, as I not only neglected a masterpiece but I offended my dad. This room had his personality written all over it; it was his creation.

Taking a step back!

Unfortunately, this situation happens to many of us. People become this living room. This could explain why as teenagers we treated our parents the way we did; that, and well, hormones. We get accustomed to our parents’ presence in our daily lives, that we begin avoiding them and taking them for granted. This happens in other relationships as well. We stop seeing the beauty we saw when we first met someone because with time we get acquainted to them. It is an inevitable crime that we are guilty of committing.

See, I couldn’t even describe the living room before my friend came over; I couldn’t even tell you that the curtains matched the couch, as I never realized this detail. I would simply pass by this room everyday on my way to my bedroom, without even glancing at it. I was not even sure what I wanted to change about the room, I just wanted it to look different. It took an outside perspective for me to realize how great this room was. I now appreciate it and have been reminded of the beauty. Change is not as simple as changing a living room. It is important for us to be able to recall what makes an individual special and appreciate those traits, as everyone has their own unique characteristics to offer.


Forgotten Beauty, Picture, MGS Counseling

No one deserves to be forgotten and neglected like my living room and it was all because I forgot to stop and observe what it had to offer. Children share a positive outlook on the world around them because they are genuinely fascinated by their surroundings. They are experiencing and being introduced to certain things for the first time, as my friend demonstrated as she walked into my house. If we had the same perspective as children, the world would be a better place. We would demonstrate love and appreciation to everything, as we should. Life is fascinating. People are fascinating. We should never get accustomed to anything around us. Everything is different, unique, and has something to offer. Sometimes, we just need a reminder.

Thank you!

MGS Counseling & Therapy Services, LLC is a South Florida private practice. Mrs. Wilson works with mothers dealing with postpartum and fathers who have difficulty with transitional changes after a new child. In addition Mrs. Wilson works with individuals, couples and families to find their inner strength and resolve interpersonal and relational conflicts. To schedule an appointment with Mrs. Wilson call (754) 999-0410 or contact by email at

Parenting? What’s that?

Parenting? Whats That? Parenting? What’s That?

Parenting? What’s that? I can’t tell you how many times I have heard this from expecting or new parents. Grandparents that have to take over the role of mom or dad due to a change in the family structure. For some an addition to the family can be a scary thing.

So what is parenting? Where do we get the rule book or guidelines on how this is supposed to be done? Well the answer to this is simple and one many of you have heard before. There is not such book to be found. However we do have something that we never had before. We have the ability to gain access to a network of people who can provide us with insight and education on developmental stages for our children. Mothers and fathers who could share scary, funny or insightful stories in the journey of parenthood.

This network of people I am referring to can be found in our communities, families and social media support groups. We have the ability to reach a number of people, our parents could never dream up. MGS Mom’s and MGS Healing Mothers have shown such support to Mothers and Expecting Mothers along with Mothers who have lost a child. Parenting starts when we know we have support, understanding we will have ups and downs. Along with gaining understanding in ourselves and the situations we will have to encounter.

Parenting is sharing an unconditional love with a child or children who see you as their superhero. Sharing the silent moments after they have gone to sleep with some well needed quiet time. Gaining that second wind after you feel your fuel tank for energy is on E. Parenting is when you share a story in a support group and other parents can relate. Parenting is defined as so many things. We as parents can work together to make sure our children get the best example of what that can be.

So as you walk or run through this journey of parenthood. Utilize the community support you have and share support with another parent. We all have our own stories however we can all use the support.

If you have questions or comments follow us on Facebook (Link provided below) and share your thoughts.

Till the next time.

Live, Laugh, Love

T.P.C (The Parent Counselor)

Gail Wilson is a Therapist, Life Coach and Public Speaker in South Florida. Mrs. Wilson works with mothers dealing with postpartum and fathers who have difficulty with transitional changes after a new child. In addition Mrs. Wilson works with individuals, couples and families to find their inner strength and resolve interpersonal and relational conflicts. To schedule an appointment with Mrs. Wilson call (754) 999-0410 or contact by email at